Here is an actual thing that happened to me yesterday.

I opened my email, only to see that my friends at 826 NYC had written. “Hey,” they said (OR WORDS TO THAT EFFECT), “we’re having our annual SCRABBLE FOR CHEATERS tournament, and Peter Dinklage was supposed to come, but something came up. We were wondering if you would replace him.”

Friends, I had to sit with that one for a moment.

I was being asked to replace Peter Dinklage.

THAT Peter Dinklage.

Who is Tyrion.

Who is an international superstar.

Because, when you can’t get Peter Dinklage, who do you think of? THIS GIRL, THAT’S RIGHT.

I hate Scrabble with a mad passion, but I love being Peter Dinklage and I love 826 NYC and I love cheating, so I said yes SO FAST that my email traveled BACK IN TIME to before they even asked me.

Then i recruited Robin Wasserman, because she went to Harvard and is actually GOOD at Scrabble. 

Then I had another idea. “I need a shirt,” I said to myself. “A shirt that says REPLACEMENT PETER DINKLAGE.” So I called up Alan at DFTBA and Jordan from LeakyCon and within 20 minutes Jordan had done the art and Alan had set up the shirt at the store.

I AM ASKING FOR YOUR SUPPORT. Not for me—well, for me, I like to win—but for 826 NYC, which is an AWESOME writing charity that does tons of great work. You can help in TWO WAYS:

- Pre-order a PETER DINKLAGE REPLACEMENT shirt from DFTBA. Everything I make from this pre-order I am giving to 826 NYC. This shirt is AWESOME. I asked Jordan to distress the letters so it looks like a bad iron-on job. It’s SWEET. And no one will have any idea what it means. (We’re sending a shirt to Peter Dinklage, so you can have the same shirt as PD, so that makes you coole.) Seriously, no one will know what the hell this is. You should get one.

This is the shirt:

- Just donate to our team, PETER DINKLAGE REPLACEMENT. It’s fast and easy, and helps us CRUSH our opponents and gets money for 826.

Scrabble is coming.