Dear friends,
In a serious lapse of judgment, I wrote a book called Your Guide to Not Getting Murdered in a Quaint English Village, which was illustrated by my friend Jay Cooper. This book is all about how to visit a quaint English village (first tip: don’t) and survive. You can read more about this book hereYour Guide to Not Getting Murdered in a Quaint English Village
, but I do not think you should. It is a dangerous book. I should never have done it. I AM SORRY. I was trying to help, but I worry I’ve made the problem worse by tempting people to make the journey. In fact, this book is now a NATIONWIDE BESTSELLER! Terrible, terrible news.
Well, I’ve done it now. I have to make the best of it.
Some of you have gotten copies of this book (again, my apologies). You will have seen the incredible art Jay made for it. Would you like some of this art? The art, at least, is safe.

Jay and I are giving out a limited number of SIGNED PRINTS. Yes, proper art stuff. How can you get one of these? For the next two weeks, if you post pictures of yourself reading this book and following its advice
, along with the hashtag #englishmurdervillage so we can find your photos, we will choose twenty people to receive the signed prints. FURTHERMORE, we will send signed bookplates of warning to fifty more. All you have to do is post the photos on Instagram or Twitter, including the hashtag. (It is also helpful to tag me, @maureenjohnson on Twitter and @maureenjohnsonbooks on IG, and/or @jaycooperart on Twitter and @jaycooperbooks on IG.)
We will be out there looking until the 13th of October, scanning Twitter and IG for the hashtag and the photos. You will never know when we are coming–you will only know we were there if we send you a message. Obviously, do not open messages, but in this case you will open it and it will say HELLO WE ARE GOING TO SEND YOU AN ART/WE ARE GOING TO SEND YOU A CURSED BOOKPLATE.
We leave the content of the images up to you. We will repost the selected images so you can see all the bad decisions other people are making.
That is all.
Good luck.
We just bought Not Getting Murdered….and love it. My wife and I watch British tv and our latest favorite show is Midsomer Murders. I had joked with my wife that with the number of people killed over the last 20 seasons the place must be empty. As a former New Yorker I appreciate your sense of humor